Deciphering a man’s true intentions, especially as you only start dating, is not easy. Unless you are an expert in people reading, you may not spot a lie. However, decades of psychological research have given us a wealth of information to help detect liars. Here are just a few of the red flags that should raise concerns.
He Avoids “I”
Omitting this pronoun in written communication is a telling sign. To liars, not uttering “I” makes the lie impersonal and thus less of a crime. If you ask him how he spent the previous night and get an incomplete sentence like “in a bar”, chances are he is not being truthful.
You are not Part of His Life
He may be telling you a lot about his buddies and family members, but if he does not even suggest introducing you, be wary. A man with this behavioral pattern does not view you as his potential soulmate.
Those incredible travel companions he is always mentioning may even be non-existent. In addition, keeping your relationship and his life compartmentalized, he can lie easily. After all, if people do not overlap, you can fabricate all kinds of stories about them.
He Avoids Eye Contact
Of course, talented liars will still look you in the eye and tell their tales. For ordinary types, this is, however, challenging. Avoidance of direct eye contact is a well-known sign of dishonesty.
The other possibility is excess of it. In this case, a man acts unnaturally in his efforts to persuade you. In any case, analyze his general pattern. If certain topics require him to make more or less eye contact, you have probably caught a liar.
Lying on a regular basis is hard. Not only does he need to control his facial expressions and gestures, memorizing all the details of a fabricated story is not easy. If he confuses details when he tells the same story again or seems to forget things that are not easily forgotten, this is another red flag.
Longer Response Time
Liars need to think their messages over carefully. If you send him texts and notice that his replies are not crafted as quickly as before, he could be lying. On the other hand, it all depends on the circumstances.
If you are absolutely positive he is not in a meeting or busy with anything else, this could be a sign. A liar will lag when certain questions come up, and if you can see a pattern, dig deeper.
Too Much or Too Little Information
Both could point to a lie. When describing a restaurant meal, for example, most people will mention a few descriptive details, like the quality of the food or the style of music and the design of the interior. So, if he makes his description too elaborate, you have reasons to be worried. He is probably trying to make you believe a fabricated story.